Tag Archives: journaling

MS and fatigue :(

Just about to sit and put my thoughts down in the name of a blog post.

journal50019628_nIt’s taken me all morning to have breakfast, take my medicine(S), and catch up with a girlfriend on the phone. Of course, now it’s 2:27 and I’m CRASHING! Dammit! Gotta go.

Comments:

When have you found fatigue to disrupt your day?

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MS and depression: You can’t post that! It’s depressing.

Member 1: “You can’t post that! It’s depressing and it has absolutely NOTHING to do with MS.”

 Board President-Estizer Smith Board Members-Estizer Smith, Estizer Smith, Estizer Smith, Estizer Smith

Board President-Estizer Smith
Board Members-Estizer Smith, Estizer Smith, Estizer Smith,
Estizer Smith

Member 2: “So what…it’s real! Everything in my life involves MS. It’s at the core.

Member 1: “What about your original mission statement and goals? To educate, inspire and inform, it does NONE of those things.

Member 2: “You’re right, it doesn’t, and those are the reasons that we blog. It’s only one post though! It’s balanced out because there are three more waiting that are on the same subject and they are super positive. It was just a tough day emotionally. I DO have those.”

Member 3: “What about all of this BUS DRIVING? Is that all you plan to write about now? If that’s the case then you should start another blog about driving a bus, or one where you can rant about anything you want, but you should say that up front. You set this up as an MS blog. When people click here they expect to find information about MS. It’s misleading. I’d be pissed if I were looking for symptoms, or drug updates. You’ve got to think about your readers.”

Member 4: “HA! What readers! You mean all THREE of them? You are right. That’s absolutely why I started this blog, because I want to share, learn from and engage others with this disease. It’s been over a year and I have all of three readers, only ONE of which actually has MS.”

Member 6: “Be patient. Blogs take time.”

Member 2: “No- I think it’s all good and all inspirational. Even your difficult days; no, especially your difficult days. Those days say to others that it’s not easy, and it can suck, but you can’t give up! Those days say, hold on, things always get better.”

Member 5: “Hmmm, THIS is what sucks. This makes my brain hurt, it’s like cerebral pushups. It may be THIS that’s not worth it. We write but we can’t agree so we stop writing. When we don’t write we’re not happy. It’s a very important stress management tool we’ve used for years.”

Member 6: “So just write. If that’s the case…just write, who cares.”

journal50019628_n

Member5:” Then I might as well just write in my journal. That’s what I’ve done for years. The reason for the blog is to share. Share and engage.”

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Filed under MS and Depression, Uncategorized

MS: My Mind-Body Connection

The house is SO quiet; I can hear the hum of emptiness. The holidays are over, and as of yesterday my husband and I are “empty nesters”… I think; does being off at college count? I’ll tell you what, it’s the first time in twenty years that we didn’t have to “close the door”. It was AWESOME!

I’ve got to take immediate action to fill the emptiness. In the three weeks that the house was filled with holiday energy and family I experienced improvement with my MS relapse that I can measure. It’s exciting and supports the Mind-Body Connection Approach to healing. As I researched this approach, I discovered that there is much more to it than I first thought.

MIND-BODY CONNECTION

(BODY)Observations at start of Holiday break: Legs extremely weak, mobility very unstable. Outside of house dependent upon cane 100%.

(MIND)Changes observed: 1st day home, daughter hugged me and told me quietly she was glad I was doing “okay”. She has clearly been worried and is now relieved. I felt an increased level of concern and compassion. Son home more and he’s very happy. He’s planning to move out, which adds to his happiness. I am going to miss him; I enjoy having his “energy” in the house. Ultimately, both children will leave.

(MS RESULTS) Symptoms observed during last week of Holiday Break: Legs still extremely weak, mobility moderately stable. I have not used my cane at all in a week. Used family members for stability (held daughters hand). Went out alone! Still have trouble with the “wobbly, drunk” walk but not enough to use my cane. Just slow down, or stop walking, recover…stabilize, and start again.

To me, this is a clear case of a “Mind-Body, Connection” and I’m excited because I have a measurable outcome. The official research is much more sophisticated, with hypnosis, guided imaginary, meditation, visualization and a few more long words. I AM a believer in many of these techniques and if they are given serious time and energy, I’m sure they can be used quite effectively in developing a mind-body approach that fits. It is NOT, I repeat…not, a one-size fits all scenario. I meditate and I just don’t think about it being a part of my M-B healing approach, but it most certainly is. Writing in my journal and on my blog are as well.

If I were my own doctor however, I would insist on more aggressive “mindful” activities. My goal is to continue the positive effects that I am seeing in my body right now. These activities are not the kind that my mind needs to “connect” with my body, for continued healing; to bring me out of this relapse! My mind needs compassionate activities that involve other people and physical touch. My mind needs lots of hugs, maybe small children; photographing a pre-school class. Teaching photography to six year-olds. An art project that I am emotionally invested in, maybe a play. See my son once a week… learn to shoot pool. It is important for me to stay as active as possible and emotionally engaged. Not at ALL one size fits all.

That’s an awful lot of work. Maybe I’ll just get a puppy. I’ve heard that they’re great for filling empty houses and…hearts.

Meet Malcolm!

Meet Malcolm!

Leave a comment; tell me what you think:
Can you put your finger on an event that might have triggered a relapse?

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Filed under Awesome Sex, Mental Well-Being, Mind-Body Connection